This week I took part in my first Boxercise class – which was marvellous – to the extent that it has me ruminating over exactly how much I enjoy punching things. I had done a little bit of punching in circuits classes and was recently bought a punching bag. Armed with a nice pair of pink gloves [yes – it turns out if you put “Boxing Gloves for Women” into Google you are offered the pink ones first] I can set about the punching bag whenever I’ve had a particularly trying day or stressful couple of hours.
Aside from being enjoyable this form of exercise is excellent for getting lots of aggression and stress out of your system. It struck me you could even adorn your punching bag with the face of someone with whom you were particularly irritated in order to increase both your motivation and the velocity of the punches themselves. In fairness my punchbag would mostly feature Jordan ! That said, the ‘face on the punchbag” idea was bettered a year or so ago when I discovered via a photographer friend there are companies that will print a photo of your choice onto rolls of toilet paper … now wouldn’t THAT be satisfying at times ??
Whilst contemplating the whole issue of punching I remembered that a few years back facebook used to be full of useless quizzes and I completed one called “5 Celebrities you’d like to punch in the face” … some of those listed were clearly topical at the time – including Matthew Wright of the Wright Stuff and Kerry Katona with her Prawn Ring .. and some would be on my list permanently – Katie Price (obviously). However narrowing such a list to just 5 really does make you analyse your feelings more specifically and hone down the levels of annoyance you feel towards certain people as the list could, quite frankly, be endless.
So who would be on the list today? Well, I don’t do Reality Shows but the many many brainless idiots who appear on them come onto my Radar via other comedy shows and chat shows so some will inevitably make the list.
* Without question Jedwood have to be on there. I can’t believe people are still paying them and I only hope the vast sums of money they are paying them will go some way towards compensating their poor Mum and Dad for what must have been a truely horrendous parenting experience.
* Amy Childs from TOWIE – who I once heard someone describe as “fodder” for TV comedy panelists. This is someone so beyond stupid that it is actually physically painful to watch her trying to form a sentence – though watching her being torn to pieces on Celebrity Juice wasn’t painful – it was great. Rufus Hound looking at her in disbelief and saying “it’s like you literally don’t know the meaning of words” was truely a series highlight for me. Though for those of you that watch not much will beat the Ant and Dec episode 🙂
* Katie Price – no explanation needed
* Peaches Geldolf – for being irritating yes, but more importantly for carrying on chatting on her mobile having just tipped her unharnessed baby out of its buggy onto the pavement.
* and finally … The Beiber – can’t stand him. Young, smug, insanely rich and very, very punchable.
The only good thing I can say about Justin Beiber is that a web link, about an office prank featuring his face, managed to brighten up a very rubbish day I was having about 18 months ago. In case you didn’t see it .. enjoy it here. But other than that – just want to punch him.